The People's Socialist Republic of Iron Vakia is a gargantuan, orderly nation, ruled by Jozef Tesarik with an iron fist, and remarkable for its sprawling nuclear power plants, disturbing lack of elderly people, and rampant corporate plagiarism. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 13.643 billion Vakiß are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Law & Order, Education, and Healthcare also on the agenda, while Environment and International Aid aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Vakigorod. The average income tax rate is 98.2%.

The enormous but inefficient Vakian economy, worth a remarkable 3,086 trillion Bujs a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched black market in Arms Manufacturing, Uranium Mining, Information Technology, and Beef-Based Agriculture. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is an amazing 226,229 Bujs, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Peer pressure from cooler world leaders directs Vakian government policy, it takes months to get the proper permits for a child's first tricycle, scenic mountain valleys are flooded with water as damming projects get underway, and scientists regularly clone human beings for research purposes. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Iron Vakia's national animal is the Wilk, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Iron Vakia is ranked 286,296^th in the world and 10,707^th in Osiris for Most Cheerful Citizens, with 2.81 Percentage Of Water Glasses Perceived Half-Full.